Therapy & Support

BSConcern signposts former boarders looking for therapeutic help to counsellors and psychotherapists who are both registered and accredited members of the UKCP (United Kingdom Council for Psychotherapy) or the BACP (British Association of Counsellors & Psychotherapists) or other recognised professional therapeutic bodies. Counsellors and therapists who are members of these organisations are bound by a professional code of ethics; are obliged to operate and deliver their services within robust ethical frameworks; and are accountable to their supervisor and the complaints procedure of their particular organisation. For BSConcern, client safety is paramount: and, we believe that signposting to professional therapeutic bodies is the best way to protect former boarders on their healing journey.

Furthermore, BSConcern suggests working with counsellors and psychotherapists who have had specialist training in work with former boarders (e.g. UMOT training run by Nick Duffell).

Looking for a Therapist

When looking for a therapist, you can go directly to the website of the professional body (e.g. BACP or UKCP); or use a therapist directory such as the Counselling Directory or one which is for therapists who specialise in working with former boarders such as Boarding Recovery. When using a directory, please note BSConcern’s signposting with regard to a therapist being a member of a professional body – this will be detailed on the therapist’s listing.

There are many different modalities within counselling and psychotherapy, e.g. psychodynamic, personal centred, Gestalt and integrative. Finding the right therapist for you, who has the necessary training, is thought by many in the profession to be more important than the modality. When considering contacting a therapist, many will offer an initial call or session so that you can decide whether they are the right therapist for you. You are not committed to anything by making contact.

While most therapists who have completed specialist training for former boarders are talking-therapy focused, they may also use methods such as art, music and meditation to help you on your healing journey.

If you need further help with your search for the right therapist to work with, please contact us in confidence.

Boarding School Survivors run weekend workshops in London for male and female adult former boarders. They can also provide you with details of therapists specially trained in boarding issues.

http://www.boardingrecovery.com is an organisation peopled by a group of accredited psychotherapists and trained counsellors who specialise in working with ‘boarding school survivors’. Boarding Recovery offers a support service for adult ex-boarders whose emotional damage often lies hidden until at some point in their adult lives it re-surfaces in the form of depression, burn out, marital problems or alcohol/drug abuse.

The UK Council for Psychotherapy advises how to find psychotherapists and counsellors

https://www.psychotherapy.org.uk

The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy maintains lists of qualified therapists by area.

https://www.bacp.co.uk

INFORMATION FOR SPOUSES/PARTNERS

Being the partner of someone who went to boarding school when they were young can be difficult.  That’s why we thought of offering group support – whether it’s to throw some light on why your partner behaves as he or she does, or that they don’t appear to be able to listen to how you feel.  When your partner has closed down emotionally it is more than difficult to understand.

This is what this group is here for. It is specifically designed for you to be able to vent. We can listen, give you links to organisations or suggest a list of books that might help you to understand where your partner is coming from, and can also give you some insight into the effects that boarding school might have had on your partner. 

It is run by a qualified psychotherapist, Helena Thomas, and is open to anyone who is, or has, lived with an ex-boarder. If you are interested, please go here.

There is also a website called Living With an Ex Boarder.